Wednesday, April 12, 2006
The right path?
I think I took that step yesterday Zoe.
My sister accused me of trying to make everyone else happy. I think she was right. Maybe I was allowing myself to be disrespected because I felt like it was my penance (is that the right word?) But I stood and had a talk with all 3 of them.
My daughter - I told her flat out that I would no longer accept her disrespect of me or anyone else in our home. I laid down the consequences for such behavior. I told her that if she had problems or issues I am more than willing to discuss them with her, but she will have to do it in a respectful manner. We went on to have a very good, respectful conversation. One down, two to go.
My ex - I told him what I discussed with our daughter and then I told him that it went for him too. I would no longer accept him disrespecting me either. I told him that he shouldn't say anything to me that he wouldn't let his children hear him say. If he could not conduct himself in a respectful manner, I would shut off our communication. We would have to parent the children on our own without the support of each other. Two down, one to go.
My girl - I told her about the two previous conversations and then told her that I needed her to be more of a support to me. That I need her to stand beside me not behind me.
I know that none of this solves anything but perhaps I am on the road to a more "balanced" life. Yeah right!
My sister accused me of trying to make everyone else happy. I think she was right. Maybe I was allowing myself to be disrespected because I felt like it was my penance (is that the right word?) But I stood and had a talk with all 3 of them.
My daughter - I told her flat out that I would no longer accept her disrespect of me or anyone else in our home. I laid down the consequences for such behavior. I told her that if she had problems or issues I am more than willing to discuss them with her, but she will have to do it in a respectful manner. We went on to have a very good, respectful conversation. One down, two to go.
My ex - I told him what I discussed with our daughter and then I told him that it went for him too. I would no longer accept him disrespecting me either. I told him that he shouldn't say anything to me that he wouldn't let his children hear him say. If he could not conduct himself in a respectful manner, I would shut off our communication. We would have to parent the children on our own without the support of each other. Two down, one to go.
My girl - I told her about the two previous conversations and then told her that I needed her to be more of a support to me. That I need her to stand beside me not behind me.
I know that none of this solves anything but perhaps I am on the road to a more "balanced" life. Yeah right!
posted by Unbalanced at 3:29 PM, | 
4 Comments:
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Good for you! I'm sure everything won't be magically solved, but I think it's a good first step. You deserve to be happy and to live your life as you wish.
You took the first step, and I bet that was very hard. But, talking things in a respectful manner gets things done a lot faster. Wish you the best...for a better life for you and your partner. It must be hard for her as well. So, be sopportive of each others life.
Thank you both for listening to my rants!
Mar - you're right, it is hard for her. Sometimes I do forget... it's a work in progress.
Mar - you're right, it is hard for her. Sometimes I do forget... it's a work in progress.
Thank you both for listening to my rants!
Mar - you're right, it is hard for her. Sometimes I do forget... it's a work in progress.
Mar - you're right, it is hard for her. Sometimes I do forget... it's a work in progress.