Thursday, April 06, 2006

Cry me a river

Oh my! I really don't like that song. I don't know why it is in my head.

Anyway, I have been so emotional lately and I'm getting headaches everyday. My girlfriend thinks it's stress related and she's probably right. There just never seems to be enough time or money. I'm struggling a lot with my oldest daughter. Most teenagers tell their parents that they hate them at one point or another. I know that. I just kind of brushed it off the first time or two, I know she says it out of anger. But when she stands in your face and calmly and defiantly tells you that she hates you and because of you she hates all gay people, that's tuff. She's usually so open-minded, yet she doesn't just hate me, but hates what I am.

We used to have such a close relationship and I want that back. So I thought maybe it's time I get her into some counseling, to help her learn how to deal with all the troubles in her life right now. So I called and made her an appointment. Now I'm worried I might have made a rash decision. Not about putting her in counseling, but in choosing who to take her too. I'm not sure why I feel like that. My daughter and I both went in together and gave some background info, then they talked alone. Sitting in the waiting room I started questioning myself. What do I really know about this person? What is her approach to her patients? What are her beliefs and how do they play into her work? OMG my head was reeling. I still don't know if I made the right decision, but I am going to speak with her privately and ask these questions. Why I didn't before, I have no idea.
posted by Unbalanced at 10:19 AM, |


  At 4:21 PM Blogger Syd said:
disclaimer: I am not a parent.

That said, I was once a teenager. I'm surprised that my parents let me survive. They really shoulda taken me out.

My mother once told me that she questioned everything she did, esp w/ me (I'm the oldest). But, you just do the best you can. I'm sure it's natural that you question this and every other decision. I think they call it good parenting.
  At 4:46 PM Blogger Unbalanced said:
Awww, thanks Syd. I'm already emotional, saying nice things could make me start "leaking" again.
Hey you. Thanks for stopping by my blog again. I question everything in my life sometimes your life is VERY similar to mine,and we have been raised a little of the same ways. You are a giver like me and just want the ones you love to be happy. That is a great thing, but remember to love yourself and make time for you. It will be ok. You and your GF will work things out. When people aremenat to be things just work themsleves out. Communication is key. Lauren and I are still working on that. It's hard esepcially with kids around to add to the cahos. If you need a friend I am here. ((( HUGS )))
  At 8:56 AM Blogger Unbalanced said:
Thank you MLM! It's nice to hear from you! Hope you had a great weekend.
  At 8:25 PM Blogger SassyFemme said:
Is there any chance that she's saying she hates who you are because it's hitting close to home (meaning is she questioning herself) and she's lashing out against it; fighting it, and you, with all she's got? Just a wild hair idea...

No matter what, the couceling is a good idea, hope that when you ask the questions you get the answers you were hoping to get.

Hang in there!
  At 8:58 AM Blogger Unbalanced said:
I don't know Sassy, that's certainly a good point. I think it would help her to get to know some kids who have been or are going thru their parents coming out, someone she can relate too. I know she doesn't mean that she hates gay people, she only said it to hurt me. I have some "almost" family that we just reconnected with and she met a woman, who was like an older sister to me, and her wife and loved them to pieces.

I don't know for sure, I'm just going to try some things. If anyone has any suggestions, please let me know!

Thanks Sassy for your encouragement.