Friday, March 17, 2006

History #1

Ok, so I'm going to attempt to give a little history of my life. Countless important things will be left out I'm sure, as the story does branch off into many different directions. Anyhow, here goes...

My mother was one of 12 children. One died at birth, one half of a set of twins, so there are 11 living. The youngest, a girl, was the only one raised in my grandmother's home. All the rest were spread out, I'm not even sure where some of them were raised. My mother ended up living with her father until she was 10 or 11. After being removed from his home she spent several years living in a group home which released you at age 16. At that point she was taken into a foster home. It was very strict and rarely enjoyable, but she was loved and cared for. She ended up living there into her 20's. This is the place she now considers home.

Given my mom's lack of role model as a parent I'm sure you can gather that being a parent herself was not an easy task. She ended up with 4 kids, 2 boys and 2 girls. My brothers are older and after her divorce with their dad, his parents ended up with custody of them. Then came me and then my sister 2 years later. Incidentally, my father died in a drunk driving accident on the day my sister was born. My mom didn't really have a relationship with my father, so it's like that whole side of my history or lineage is just gone, wiped clean.

So growing up it was just my mom, my sister, and I. My mom didn't always have the capabilities of caring for us and so the cycle continued. Both my sister and I spent many years in and out of a particular group home. My sister made the rounds on a few more than I did, she also lived with an aunt for awhile. I ended up living with my best friend in junior high for 3 years.

There was abuse in all our childhoods that in many, many ways still affects us today. Somehow I broke out of this mold and started to build a foundation for my life.

More later...
posted by Unbalanced at 8:05 PM, |


  At 1:35 PM Blogger Zoe said:
I am so glad for you for breaking out of that mold and putting an end to the cycle. You must have great strength.
  At 7:41 AM Blogger Unbalanced said:
Thank you Zoe. I knew I wanted better for my children. I've still made some mistakes along the way but I always try to make it right.
  At 5:34 PM Anonymous Anonymous said:
Honey, I never knew that about your father. I am sorry. And on the day your sister was born.
  At 5:50 PM Blogger r.d. said:
You sound pretty balanced to me. What's up with the eyes- yours? I've just stumbled across your blog.
  At 7:50 AM Blogger Unbalanced said:
r.d. - Thank you, but I rarely feel balanced. My life gets pretty hectic and I just want to run away. But. I can't do that. Too many people rely on me. And my kids deserve better than that. Hence, me working to break that cycle.

Yes, those are my eyes. Some would say the windows to my soul.

Welcome and watch your step, I wouldn't want you to trip.
Thank you for the comment on my blog - I appreciate it so much. I also just read your archives, although I probably had a much easier and quicker time reading yours than you had reading mine *laughs*

When I am a little more settled I will be back - I just wanted to say thanks xx
  At 11:45 AM Blogger r.d. said:
Oh how true;our eyes are the window to our souls. Sounds like you just need to stop spinning...easier said than done, I know. My partner is a Life Coach- you should check them out.? Pretty cool.

Oh, and don't worry about me, I always watch my step. Take care.
  At 3:24 PM Blogger Unbalanced said:
Deadly - thank you for stopping by. It was no hardship reading your archives, I enjoyed it. Definitely gave me a better understanding of your situation. Keep you chin up and come back any time. You are welcome.

r.d. - forgive the lack of knowledge... what exactly is a Life Coach?
  At 9:22 PM Blogger r.d. said:
Someone who helps you get your life "balanced"